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英语短文改错题(逻辑错误,语法错误,拼写错误)

答案:2  悬赏:50  
解决时间 2021-02-06 06:49
A Blind Man

All is minfortune,at least,I hade admitted is for a long time
I was a clear-eyed infant and childbefore twelve years old,At that year, my awe-inspirng vision was dimmed by an accident.
I thought the angel who preside my vision has abandoned our indestructible companionship.
Soon,I rediscovered that I was inadequate to confront what had has happened and hanppening.
Self-defeated conquerd my heart,The mood always despair.I thought I could no longer do anything by myself.
But the Jesus still look after me ,use his majestic,sincerely power in disposal every earthly things.Though I didn’t know that yet rhen.
One day, I was walking along the river along rhe river ,stepping on the fertile ground,Some voice-in exactly it’s music played by Nature-was heared by my cute ears.Meanwhile I felt I was assimilated by the world, partly it aroused my heart which had slept so long. Henceforth,I was addicted with music.Everyday,when the dawn come,If you at the same place then,you can find a figure,stand against the flowing stream,was singing a song without words. That’s me ,who was singing with a many-voiced Nature-Chorus.
When I was singing,I could feeling the winds embodied soil’s perfume,I could feeling the clouds embodied fruits’flavour. I could feeling the tide ebb and flow,I could feeling the flower wither and bloom, I could feel infinitely things though my eyes disused.
“When the Lord close the door , somewhere He opens a window”

名词形容词其实没明确界限,可以多用的。多多指教!
我没觉得宗教意义极深啊? 我不是宗教人士。
最佳答案
修改了一些用词和句法,这样会更通顺一点,不过尽量没有改动原意。

All is misfortune--at least I have admitted so for a long time.
I was a clear-eyed child before I became twelve years old, when my awe-inspiring vision was dimmed by an accident.
I thought the angel who preside my vision has abandoned me in our companionship once perceived as indestructible.
Soon I found that I was not ready to confront what had happened and was happening.
My hearts was filled with feelings of self-defeat and despair, and I thought I could no longer do anything by myself.
But Jesus still looks after me, using his majestic and miraculous power in disposal of every earthly thing. Though I didn’t know it then.
One day I was walking along the river, stepping on the fertile ground, when my acute ears caught voices, or to be more exact, music played by nature. Gradually I felt assimilated into the world, and it aroused my heart, which had been sleeping for so long. Henceforth, I was addicted to music. Everyday at dawn people can find a figure, standing at the same place by the flowing stream, singing a song without words. That would be me joining with many sounds into the grand chorus of nature.
Every time when I sing, I could feel soil’s fragrance in the winds; I could feel fruits’ flavor in the clouds; I could feel the tide ebb and flow; I could feel the flower’s withering and blooming; I could feel the infinity; all these I feel without using sight.
“When the Lord close the door, somewhere He opens a window”

Infant是幼儿,child是小孩,两个里面用一个就好。Sincerely是副词,形容词形式应该是 sincere,但是我个人建议用miraculous 或者其他类似的词汇。

Could 后面的动词应该是原型,所以是 could feel,而不是could feeling。

我觉得讲Jesus那一段和最后一句话跟文章有点合不上,给人感觉像是忽然冒出来的,所以要做一些衔接会比较好一点,比如说可以讲一下Jesus是如何照顾主人公的,或者说一下打开的窗户是什么(虽然知道是学会欣赏大自然的音乐,但是还是要明确提到一下为好,英文毕竟不像中文那么含蓄)。其实我觉得根据文章的内容,不提到上帝什么的也是可以的,就说从困境中获得了以前不曾有的收获就好了。:-)

虽然不是太大的问题,但是似乎应该注意一下,英语句子逗号和句号都紧跟着句子,而且后面都要空一格。还有有一些打字的时候出现的拼写错误。交上去之前记得检查。 :-)
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